You are Not Wrong– this has become my mantra for the past week. So often as I go about my day, excessive worry, guilt or all-around feeling bad creeps in. I have a tendency to self-attack and over-worry, sadly I know I am not alone in this. However this is not our natural state, the true self is not self-loathing. We are taught to self attack, bred to self-hate and once these triggers are in place there are extremely hard to turn off.
Because self attack and self doubt do not come from the true-self, getting centered and in touch with the true, wise part of ourselves is a way to negate self attack. However, centering does not always happen. I can know I need to get in touch with the wise old woman within, and I can try to center, but if I don’t have the time to meditate or am already too far off the off the worry-wagon it probably won’t happen. I would then go on feeling awful, crazy or depressed until I somehow have a breakthrough, a therapy session or can give myself hours to meditate and reflect.
When I catch myself feeling off, bad or guilty my therapist suggested that I try simply telling myself “you are not wrong.” When I hear this sentence it comes from a place of pure self-energy, from the wise part within me, this part knows I am not wrong. This also touches on self-forgiveness, of the idea that no matter what your choices were in the past, you did what you needed to in order to survive and that was the right choice. In addition to this knowledge, by living a self aware lifestyle and consciously making the right choices and thinking about my actions I know in my heart that I am not wrong.
When bad feelings come up, saying to myself You are not Wrong has worked extremely well. It is instant, a jolt of energy from the true self. By telling myself this, I can stop running myself through the mud, get an instant center then move on. You can tell yourself this as many times as you need to. Remember this message is coming from the true self, the part of you that is wise, that loves and creates. This is also a way to catch bad feelings early on before they turn into a generic rumination about something that has nothing to with the original feeling.
What is interesting is to see what you are not wrong about. Saying you are not wrong works instantly for me, before I even realize what exactly I felt so bad about. When I’ve traced my thoughts backward and found the thing I was ruminating about it usually isn’t about me or isn’t mine at all. I tend to feel bad about other people’s emotions, or imagining how other people feel about me. How many ways do you make yourself wrong? By looking into this, you may learn a lot about yourself.
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[...] Rabbit Write: You Are Not Wrong – Clearing Self Attack [...]